Friday, May 15, 2015

Dream a Little Dream, Dream, Dream, Dream.....

Photo courtesy of

Publishers Clearing House has been running TV ads frequently during the last two weeks in my market here in Minnesota.  They had a winner in New York on April 30, but it looks like they're still taking entries for that same contest which offers a prize now of $2 million immediately, $10K a month for life, and a new car.  The prize before was $1 million immediately, and $7K a week for life.  When I submitted another entry yesterday, I noticed that they'd changed the prize structure again at the website, and they're calling the drawing on June 30 a "preview winner" or some such.  I suppose they need to keep the excitement building and the momentum of entries at a high pace, but it makes me wonder when they start changing what the prize is in mid-stream, before the next drawing.  The contest is #4900, if you want to check it out.

Yes, I have been entering the PCH sweepstakes again but online.  I don't have the time to do all the futzy stuff they request when they send their entries in the mail.  No, I'm not ordering any of the "fantastic" products they offer for cheap, and "as seen on TV."  It's not necessary to buy
Photo courtesy of
anything in order to submit entries.  Although, I often wonder if ordering doesn't increase one's chances somehow despite their claims to the contrary.  I also buy lottery tickets on occasion.  I realized this week that it's not that I believe so much in easy money -- winning a sweepstakes or lottery is really not easy money, the odds are way too high.  I believe in taking advantage of all possibilities.

The health crisis that knocked me down at the end of January this year prevented me from working.  I was not working at my part-time customer service job, nor was I writing and submitting essays for paychecks.  This health crisis was not part of my strategic plan for the year regarding my income, and it really hit my bank account hard.  I'm looking at the bottom of the barrel, folks.  So right now, I'm monumentally concerned about money, how to pay all my bills, and getting back on my financial feet again.

A Facebook friend set up a crowdsource funding project at GoFundMe to help me with medical expenses.  (If you'd like to help by donating to the GoFundMe project, just click on the link and donate.  Thank you!)  It has been a HUGE help with my medical bills, paying for equipment, buying clothes for work (I lost 4 clothing sizes since January and had nothing I could wear to work) mostly at local thrift stores, and help with paying my living expenses.  I return to the part-time job on Monday, but won't see any pay until early June.  I have stopped my spending except for necessities like food, rent, transportation, etc.

To complicate my financial situation, I'm also carrying about $7500 in debt that I incurred when I published Perceval's Secret as an e-book.  (If you want to help by buying my novel, just click on the title (Amazon) or (Nook) here, and buy!  Then encourage all your friends and family to buy, too!  Thank you!)  I've been making payments each month, but the interest is just killing me.  I would love to be able to pay off this debt completely right now, but I must choose between my living expenses and the debt.  So I continue to carry the debt.  Originally, I'd planned to open a crowdsource funding project at Indiegogo to raise money to pay down this debt, but after the very recent GoFundMe project, I don't feel comfortable doing that.  I'd be asking for more money from the same people even if it's for a different reason.  So, I'll wait, carry the debt, maybe do the Indiegogo project in the fall.

My next revenue-generating project is to gather the possessions that I neither need nor want, get them appraised if necessary, and then sell them.  This will help to a certain extent, but I don't own anything that would bring in a substantial amount of money.  I keep telling myself that, if nothing else, it'll be good to clean out my storage unit and the clutter in my apartment and closets.  I tried to sell some clothes earlier this week -- the thrift store wouldn't buy them because they were too "old" and "out of style" even though they were classic sheath dresses and other classic styles.  Ah, well.  It's a tough market out there.....

So, is it any wonder that I have succumbed to dreaming about winning a PCH sweepstakes or the lottery?  It would be a HUGE help to my financial situation -- pay off all the debt to begin with and all the bills.  Imagine having $10K a month coming in!?  My rent is going up June 1, too! 

What would I do if I won the big PCH prize?  Dream, dream, dream.....  I'd take care of my financial needs first, of course.  But I also have a list of people and causes that I drew up a long time ago that I would like to support with donations if I ever have the money to do so.  I do believe in helping others.  And I'd probably troll crowdfunding sites looking for projects to support that interested me, just because I know what it's like to have a project on those sites.  I suspect that all sorts of con artists will slither out of the woodwork to try to scam me, as they do whenever there's a big winner for anything.  But I won't have that money available for them.  It will be safe and secure, and I hope working as it should so that I won't ever be in this position again.

When I first started out as a working adult, I had nothing but a full time job, an apartment, and bills.  I'd rented my apartment furnished.  Today, I feel like I'm starting over at the beginning again.  All I can truly hope for is that my possessions will generate possibly more income than I expect when I sell them, and that my health continues to improve so that I can regain my footing and normal life.  I know I am not alone in this world of income inequality and financial troubles.  I'd never thought of myself as poor before, but today I am -- at least as far as money is concerned.  Fortunately, I know how to be frugal.

Up until today, I'd hoped for others more deserving to win the big lottery jackpot or the PCH sweepstakes.  It's wonderful to hear the stories of people who are down to their last $100, and then they win.  I had not thought of myself as being one of those deserving people before.  I've realized recently, though, that I am now...very deserving.  So, I dream, dream, dream......

No comments: