|Credit: Indyatwork blog|
Good grief. My first reaction: wow, doesn't he understand the developmental stage called adolescence? His reaction was way, way over the top for her transgression. But it did sound like this Facebook letter was the last straw -- he mentions that she'd done it before and he'd grounded her for it, taken away computer and other electronic privileges. His message didn't get through, clearly. But then, her message to him and her mother also hadn't gotten through to them.
So, we have a communication problem here. One half of communication is speaking. The other, and arguably more important, half is listening. No amount of shooting bullets into a laptop will make any difference if the two sides continue to not listen to each other. The father's choice to stoop to the adolescent level and post the video online for the world to see -- at least his daughter made her written message private to her friends only -- threatens to alienate his daughter in a big way. Speaking to the world and collecting the world's comments is not an effective or productive way for these two to communicate with each another.
The daughter suggests that her father pay her for her doing her chores. This is actually a good idea. Other parents pay their kids a weekly allowance that the kids earn by doing regular chores. If they don't do all their chores, they don't get their total allowance. If you want to teach your kids the value of hard work, start young with an allowance paid for chores. Draw up a written contract for your teen so everyone is on the same page about what is expected. Make it clear that the allowance pays for the teen's spending money so she won't be getting any other money except for more expensive purchases like shoes and clothes. At least until the teen lands a job and begins to earn more money.
Taking a .45 and shooting your daughter's laptop on video and posting it to the internet is not the way....